1) Our 2011 Emmys Summary: Modern Family is the Emmy’s favorite comedy, Louis C.K. didn’t win anything, The Big Bang Theory did win something, Outstanding Guest Actor in A Comedy Series is an award, despite moving to TBS, Conan loses out to NBC again, and we still think awards shows shouldn’t be televised.

2) Kumail Nanjiani, Gears of War 3, Barbara Kingsolver, and a “Make A Wish” Kid can only make for a hilarious Funny or Die sketch.

3) Patton Oswalt’s Finest Hour is available for purchase or download tomorrow!

4) The Midnight Show debunks the myths of twins in ads.

5) Who wants to fund an animated horror short starring Paul F. Tompkins? 

6) Louis C.K. is in the A.V. Club again today in what inevitably be quoted on Tumblr then reblogged throughout the entire blogosphere including right here, which doesn’t bother us in the slightest

7) Oh we forgot regarding the 2011 Emmy Awards: Jimmy Fallon’s angry clap deserves its own statue. Forget an emmy; it needs a life size one.

8) COMEDY CRAWL
SXSW Showcase @ UCB Theatre 4:30PM FREE
SXSW Showcase @ Nerdist Theater 8PM $10 
What’s Up Tiger Lily? @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill 8PM FREE
Brunch @ The Park Restaurant 9PM FREE
Keep It Clean @ 1739 Public House 10PM FREE
The BEATdown: Los Angeles @ UCB Theatre 11PM $5 

9) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
CLUB 705 705 Pier Ave., Hermosa Beach, CA/Starts 7PM-ish/no purchase necessary/first come, first served
RED ROCK 8782 W. Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served
TRIBAL CAFE 1651 W. Temple St., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 8PM/no purchase necessary/first come, first served
JAKE’S 38 W. Colorado Blvd., Pasadena, CA/Starts 8PM/Sign-up is lottery/no purchase necessary
DANGERFIELD’S 2 2860 Glenview Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up 9PM/starts after booked show/15 spots only/5 min.
GROUND ZERO USC 615 Childs Way, Los Angeles, CA (USC Campus)/nestled between three adjacent dorms approximately one block N. of Figueroa & Exposition/USC student sign-up 9PM/Non-USC student sign-up 9:15PM/first come, first served/7 min./no purchase necessary
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/bottled water and coffee provided   

10) Oh yeah, the Sheen roast is tonight, isn’t it?

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1) Jarrod Harris does stand-up and Girl From Impanema in Vietnamese on Lopez Tonight.

2) Louis C.K. on Letterman promoting the proliferation of the lion population and taking a long deserved shot at the Kansas City Royals.

3) We don’t get screeners here cause well (cough cough)… Anyways, sci-fi action comedy Attack the Block is started its limited theater run at Arclight Hollywood today and by the looks of the trailer and everyone we know and respect saying nothing but great things about it, you should probably, at the very least check it out.

4) Yesterday, Marc Maron gave a heartfelt, inspiring speech about being a comedian that we have posted at least twice already.  Read a transcript of the entire speech at the Comic’s Comic.  

“I am the future of show business. Not your show business, my show business. They want me to do this speech because I am the future of our industry. 

Then my new manager got back to me and said, “They liked the jokes you did when you introduced Kindler a couple of years ago. That’s why they asked you.”

There’s a reason we’re posting it for at least a third time and maybe more. Cringe Humor even caught a small excerpt on video of the keynote address at Just For Laughs, which in our opinion, should be reprinted several times over like the Gettysburg Address in souvenir stores across America.

5) Please read Patrick Melton’s open letter to Flappers Comedy Club and the comedy industry in general.

6) There will be an Arizona Comedy Festival and they’re currently taking submissions. [via Laughspin.com]

7) Our first piece for the Nerdist: “Why You Probably Haven’t Heard Any Funny Amy Winehouse Jokes”. Already, there’s an amazing comment from eric:

“The formula [comedy = tragedy + time] can be revised thus: (tragedy + time) / context = comedy. Time is inversely related to context–or–the more context you add, the less time between the present and the tragic event is needed in order to be funny. Less context, more time, conversely.”

Think about it. It’s kinda true.

8) TJ Miller interviewed in GQ.

9) HBO renews Real Time with Bill Maher for a 10th Season.

10) Puddin’-Prayer Chain

11) COMEDY CRAWL
Faygo Fridays w/Brendon Walsh, Nick Youssef, and Esther Povitsky @ Sal’s Comedy Hole 7:30PM $10/2 item min.
Stand-up Spotlight w/Sarah Silverman & Chelsea Peretti @ UCB Theatre 8PM $10 (stand by only) 
Re-Animator @ Steve Allen Theater 8PM $30
The 12 Shiny Nickels Show @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $10 
The Second City Late Night w/Howie Kremer @ Second City Hollywood 9PM $5
Cavemen Jet Pilot @ Hollywood Improv Lab 10:30PM $10 

12) OPEN MIC RUN
UCB THEATRE 5919 Franklin Ave., Hollywood, CA/Sign-up 5PM/Starts 5:30PM/lottery/all spots 5 min./only 10 spots available
SET LIST @ FLAPPERS BAR 102 E. Magnolia, Burbank, CA/Sign-up 5PM/Starts 5:30PM/given “set list” of topics to do jokes off of/first come, first served/no purchase necessary
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
iCANDY 1708 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 6PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served/$3 min./mixed mic/booked show in middle around 8PM
SILVERLAKE LOUNGE 2906 W. Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles, CA (Silverlake)/Sign-up (lottery) 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/4 min./no purchase necessary
SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min.
MAX BLOOM’S 200 N. Malden Ave., Fullerton, CA/Starts 7PM/booked show after/no purchase necessary
GLENDALE DAYS INN 450 N. Pioneer Dr., Glendale, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 8PM/No foul language/No purchase necessary/first come, first served   
FLOODLAMP OPEN MEG[APHONE] 3201 W. Verdugo Blvd., Burbank, CA/Starts 8PM/lottery/no purchase necessary/under floodlamp in park
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served/coffee and bottled water available   
HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts MIDNIGHT 
FLAPPERS BAR 102 E. Magnolia Ave., Burbank, CA/Starts MIDNIGHT  

13) This girl can’t be real [via Laughspin.com] Also, is “true love” still a thing?

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1) NEW EPISODES OF KID FARM!!! Here’s 6 and 7!!!

Kid Farm Channel
Tags: Atom.com | Funny Videos | Tournament | Upload

Kid Farm Channel
Tags: Atom.com | Funny Videos | Tournament | Upload

2) Louis CK on Kimmel. Yeah, CK’s mentioned on here a lot; there’s a reason for it.  Just watch. Parts 1-2-3.

3) Wanna be part of the amazing Risk!: True Stories Boldly Told Podcast? Pitch stories about CLOSE CALLS to pitches@risk-show.com.

4) Deleted Scenes for Episode 4 of Anne Frankly with Jamie Lee-Get a laugh just like you would with the actual episode.

5) Hari Kondabolu and Reggie Watts Chattin’ (thanks for @cleftclips for pointing this out)

6) Episode 4 of Runyon Canyon above Sunset with Eddie Pepitone. (Yes, it takes more than 4 episodes for Eddie to get the top of Runyon Canyon)

RUNYON: Just Above Sunset - DAY 4 - watch more funny videos

7) Why You Should Be Following Every Comic Performing on Late Night TV [via Punchline Magazine]

8) CSVPT-Comedy Show Video Promo Tuesday-1642 Comedy Social Club at 1642 Beer and Wine, this Thursday 8:30PM

9) Megan Amram on Hello Giggles: Children’s Books 2011 Editions

10) Andre Hyland as a teacher interviewing the cast of Bad Teacher. We don’t support the movie, but Andre makes up for that.

11) ON THE HORIZON
1 Year Anniversary of the Super Serious Show @ Smashbox Studios Thurs. July 21st 7PM $10
Big Ol’ Mr. Napkins’ Show @ Westside Comedy Theater Thurs. June 30th 9PM FREE

12) COMEDY CRAWL
Performance Anxiety @ The Pleasure Chest 8PM $7
WTF! LIVE w/Marc Maron @ Steve Allen Theater 8PM $10
Donkey Show @ Big Foot Lodge 8PM FREE
Merrill Davis & Friends @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8PM $5
Comedy Bang Bang @ UCB Theatre 8:30PM $5 (stand by only)
Humor Me w/Ed Crasnick @ Hollywood Improv Lab 10:30PM $5 

9) OPEN MIC RUN
BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE TOKYO @ SEÑOR FISH 422 E. 1st St., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/6 min./first come, first served/no purchase necessary
LIBRARY A COFFEE HOUSE 3418 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 7:30PM/Starts 8PM/first come, first served/no purchase necessary
WESTWOOD BREW CO 1097 Glendon Ave., Westwood, CA/Sign-up 7:30PM/Starts 8PM/lottery/first come, first served/no purchase necessary
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 8PM/first come, first served/$4 min.
WESTSIDE COMEDY THEATER 1323-A 3rd St., Santa Monica, CA (in alley between 3rd St. Promenade and 4th St.)/Sign-up 9:45PM/Starts 10PM/lottery/$1 cover
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/bottled water and coffee provided  
BLUE MONKEY LOUNGE 5521 Hollywood Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 11PM after booked show/1 drink min./first come, first served

10) So Portland is having a comedy show at an arcade… No Pun Intendo.  Count on the Bureau being there for that one.

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1) Louis CK on the Tonight Show-Parts 1-2-3

2) If you’re staying in tonight, you will be watching Futurama on Comedy Central 10PM and Louie on FX 10:30PM, then Nick Kroll on Conan 11PM TBS.

3) Best part of Thursday? Taco Eating Contest on the Compatish

4) Coupling with going weekly, the comedy show, Holy Fuck has a brand new slick website… check out HolyFuckComedy.com

5) Rob Corddry on Conan already using a Tracy Morgan reference.

6) So Ron Howard is making a live action Spy vs. Spy happen… [via Deadline]

7) If you’ve never been to Tony Sam’s Persona, you need to go. It’s groundbreaking and hilarious, but why have us tell you with words when you can see a video?

8) FYF Fest is giving away tickets!!! (it’s mostly music, but as they’ve advertised at the bottom right hand corner of their flyer, there is stand-up comedy scheduled)

9) For the entirety of next week, the whole Bureau will be up in Portland, OR on “vacation” (interpret that how you will).  Do not worry as we will continue posting and tweeting during our stay, but we won’t be able to circle our Twitter feed like a vulture with nothing better to do to find all the great bits of comedy news and shows, etc. that you’re all probably used to.  If you have a tip for a story, something to be possibly posted here, or a possible mention/plug of a show, e-mail thecomedybureau@gmail.com or tweet us @thecomedybureau.  

10) Puddin’-“Slants”

11) ON THE HORIZON
The Super Serious Show with Greg Proops @ Smashbox Studios Thurs. July 21st 7PM $15 

12) COMEDY CRAWL
This Feels Terrible @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5 
This Is Not Happening @ Hollywood Improv 8PM $5/2 item min. 
6 Degrees @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8PM $5 
Gonzo 4: Born this Gonzo @ Club L 8PM FREE 
Carnyville @ Nerdist Theater 8PM $10
Tom Segura @ Irvine Improv 8PM $15/2 item min.
Kyle Dunnigan @ Comedy & Magic Club 8PM $15/2 item min.
The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE 
Hamclown! @ Alexandria Hotel 8:30PM FREE 
Comedy Palace @ The Palace Restaurant 9PM FREE 
Skurtch Sketch w/the Midnight Show @ Moving Arts Theater 9PM FREE
Nick Kroll & Friends @ Largo at the Coronet Theatre 9PM $25
Mapping the Heavens @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand by only)
Sweet Sweet Standup @ M Bar 10PM $10 
Rest in Peace @ Hollywood Hotel 10PM FREE
Yassir Lester Day @ Hollywood Improv Lab 10:30PM $5  

13) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA 6PM/$4 minimum/first come, first served
COFEE BEAN 16101 Ventura Blvd., Encino, CA, Suite 180/Starts 7PM/mixed mic/no purchase necessary
HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 7PM/lottery/no purchase necessary
SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served
CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served/10 min.
CAFE UNURBAN 3301 Pico Blvd., Santa Monica, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 9PM/No purchase necessary  

14) It took five (or ten, not really sure) cups of coffee to get through this post.  You’re all welcome.

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1) The 9th Annual LA Improv Comedy Festival starts TOMORROW at iO West!!!  Don’t miss out on shows including the cast of the Office, Writers from Conan, Jeffrey Tambor receiving the Del Close Lifetime Achievement Award, and more.

2) June 23rd Louie comes back to FX (I know plenty of you know that, but a friendly Sunday reminder doesn’t hurt). Make sure you mark all your calendars for this (on the wall, on your phone, desktop, laptop, etc.)

3) Punchline Magazine “Analysis” Articles by the Comedy Bureau
What Exactly is a Solo Sketch Show?
The Comedy Podcast Goes ‘Postmodern’
What Makes Up a Stand-Up Comedian?
Is It Ever OK to Heckle a Comedian?
In What Setting is a Comedy Album Best Recorded?
Will Mainstream Awards Shows Ever Give Comedies the Respect They Deserve? 

4) The Art of Coming Off Casual: Letting Your Neighbors Party by Paul Danke

5) In case you missed it or have a thing about scrolling down too far, The Tip of the Hat for Katie Crown.

6) ON THE HORIZON
Drinking Buddies Presents @ Hollywood Improv Tues. Jun. 7th 8PM $14/2 item min.
Stripped Stories @ UCB Theatre Thurs. June 9th 8PM $5 
Nick Thune & Friends @ Largo at the Coronet Thurs. June 9th 8:30PM $20 
The Pod F. Tompkast @ Largo at the Coronet Sat. June 18th 8:30PM $25
Small and Tall Tales w/Margot Leitman & Jenna Brister @ UCB Theatre Wed. June 22nd 8PM $5
Nick Kroll and Friends @ Largo at the Coronet Thurs. June 23rd 9PM $25 
Two Thumbs Way Down @ Nerdist Theater Sat. June 25th 8PM $10 
One-Two Punch @ Benton Manor Sat. June 25th 8PM FREE 

7) COMEDY CRAWL
Feel Good Comedy @ The Hollywood Improv 7PM $10/2 item min. 
ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 7:30PM FREE 
2nd Antioch University Counseling Center Benefit @ The Comedy Store (Main Room) 8PM $25/2 item min.
TJ Miller (Makes Mayhem) @ Largo at the Coronet 8PM $20 (say “Allison Sent Me” and get a friend in for free)
French Toast @ Taix 8:30PM FREE 
Trick IV: A New Hope @ Dark Horse Saloon 8PM FREE 
Power Violence @ The Complex 9PM FREE 
Top Story Weekly @ iO West 9PM $5 
Gravid Water @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand by only) 

8) OPEN MIC RUN
PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/lottery
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
NERDIST THEATRE 7522 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (back room of Meltdown Comics)/Sign-up 7:15PM/Starts 7:30PM/lottery/30 spots available/no purchase necessary
TSUNAMEDY @ TRIBAL CAFE 1651 W. Temple St., Los Angeles, CA (Echo Park)/Sign-up 8PM/Starts 9PM/first come, first served/mixed mic
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed/bottled water and coffee available

9) It has come to the attention of the Comedy Bureau that two videos in particular on Osama Bin Laden’s death featuring the amazing Table of Galaxies (the hilarious duo of James Adomian and Whitest Kids U Know’s Trevor Moore) and Hasan Minhaj didn’t get nearly enough press (even though they’ve already been posted here) due to the political nature of the humor in them.  Interestingly enough, we have not vilified Bin Laden the same way we have Adolf Hitler.  Hitler is one of the “go to” references for evil incarnate and Bin Laden is far from that.  It’s not like when Indiana Jones met Hitler when there was no doubt that Indy is looking into the face of evil.  The annoucement of Osama Bin Laden’s death in the social networking age where “no stone goes unturned” and subsequently made fun of brought about jokes about the death of Osama Bin Laden explore the mythos behind Osama Bin Laden, even questioning whether he really died or not.  Watch the two videos below and think about it. 

Reality Channel
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popculturebrain:

TV Promo: Louie Season 2 (via louisck)

On FX JUNE 23rd at 10:30pm. In conclusion, CK writes, directs, stars, produces, edits, and promotes via Youtube his own show.

Also, hilarious spot.

Louie Season 2 Promo. I know it’s just a promo, but this is one of those “drop what you’re doing moments”.  So go ahead and do that and watch.