1) Our 2011 Emmys Summary: Modern Family is the Emmy’s favorite comedy, Louis C.K. didn’t win anything, The Big Bang Theory did win something, Outstanding Guest Actor in A Comedy Series is an award, despite moving to TBS, Conan loses out to NBC again, and we still think awards shows shouldn’t be televised.

2) Kumail Nanjiani, Gears of War 3, Barbara Kingsolver, and a “Make A Wish” Kid can only make for a hilarious Funny or Die sketch.

3) Patton Oswalt’s Finest Hour is available for purchase or download tomorrow!

4) The Midnight Show debunks the myths of twins in ads.

5) Who wants to fund an animated horror short starring Paul F. Tompkins? 

6) Louis C.K. is in the A.V. Club again today in what inevitably be quoted on Tumblr then reblogged throughout the entire blogosphere including right here, which doesn’t bother us in the slightest

7) Oh we forgot regarding the 2011 Emmy Awards: Jimmy Fallon’s angry clap deserves its own statue. Forget an emmy; it needs a life size one.

8) COMEDY CRAWL
SXSW Showcase @ UCB Theatre 4:30PM FREE
SXSW Showcase @ Nerdist Theater 8PM $10 
What’s Up Tiger Lily? @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill 8PM FREE
Brunch @ The Park Restaurant 9PM FREE
Keep It Clean @ 1739 Public House 10PM FREE
The BEATdown: Los Angeles @ UCB Theatre 11PM $5 

9) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
CLUB 705 705 Pier Ave., Hermosa Beach, CA/Starts 7PM-ish/no purchase necessary/first come, first served
RED ROCK 8782 W. Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served
TRIBAL CAFE 1651 W. Temple St., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 8PM/no purchase necessary/first come, first served
JAKE’S 38 W. Colorado Blvd., Pasadena, CA/Starts 8PM/Sign-up is lottery/no purchase necessary
DANGERFIELD’S 2 2860 Glenview Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up 9PM/starts after booked show/15 spots only/5 min.
GROUND ZERO USC 615 Childs Way, Los Angeles, CA (USC Campus)/nestled between three adjacent dorms approximately one block N. of Figueroa & Exposition/USC student sign-up 9PM/Non-USC student sign-up 9:15PM/first come, first served/7 min./no purchase necessary
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/bottled water and coffee provided   

10) Oh yeah, the Sheen roast is tonight, isn’t it?

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1) Deadline interviews Louis C.K. about his Emmy nominations.

2) Two open mics came to an end yesterday. iCandy in Long Beach, formerly known as the Coffee Haven, is shutting its doors entirely after running for over 8 years, while the LA Pizza Comedy Experience in Granada Hills also will be no more after running for over 3 years.  Change up your Tuesdays and Fridays as necessary if you’re looking for stage time.

3) Tickets for Paul F. Tompkins 1-hour Comedy Central Special Taping will be on sale this Monday. I know a lot of you who follow us are cheap, but this might be something you want to pay for.

4) Rob Delaney apologizes for an Internet faux pas and is written up about in a HS online newspaper.

5) Rob O’Reilly and podcast veteran Katie Levine (Carolla, Nerdist) have their own podcast now, Never Have I Ever. Somehow, I always lose at that game.

6) Part 10 of Jeff MacKinnon’s adventures at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.

7) Though you might have already seen it, here’s Chris Hardwick’s parody of Jim Carrey declaring his love for Emma Stone.

chris hardwick’s message to emma stone - watch more funny videos

8) Wisepix’s Ultimate Free & Cheap LA Comedy List 8/28-9/3.

9) ON THE HORIZON
An Evening with Brendon Walsh @ Nerdist Theater Sun. Aug. 28th $8 online/$10 at door
Hannibal Buress @ Hollywood Improv 8PM/10PM $20/2 item min.
The Jesse Miller Talk Show @ Hollywood Improv Lab Fri. Sept. 9th $5 
One-Two Punch @ The Benton Manor Sat. Sept. 24th 8PM Donations Accepted
Entertainment Hollywood Live! w/Erin Gibson & Bryan Safi @ UCB Theatre Wed. Sept. 28th 8PM $5

10) COMEDY CRAWL
North Star Comedy Hour & Meat Raffle w/Mary Mack @ Flappers YooHoo Room 7PM $5/2 item min. 
ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 8PM $10 (stand by only) 
Handshucked @ Moving Arts Theater 8PM $5
The Anytime Show w/Dominic Dierkes @ Underground Annex Theater 8PM $5
The Unholy Experiment w/John Fugelsang @ The Fake Gallery  8PM $5
Channel 101 @ Downtown Independent Theater 8PM/10PM FREE 
Gina Yashere @ Downtown Comedy Club 9PM $10/2 drink min. 
The Midnight Show’s Super Secret Pilot Party @ UCB Theatre 10PM $10 
Magic Bag @ Underground Annex Theatre 10PM $5
Grand Theft Audio @ Hollywood Improv Lab 10:30PM $5
The Walsh Brothers Show @ UCB Theatre MIDNIGHT $5 
The Tomorrow Show w/Ron Lynch & Samm Levine @ Steve Allen Theater MIDNIGHT $8

11) OPEN MIC RUN
SPOT CAFE 4455 Overland Ave., Culver City, CA/Starts 2PM/feedback given at end
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/coffee & water provided
WESTSIDE COMEDY THEATER 1323-A 3rd St. Promenade, Santa Monica, CA (in alley between 3rd and 4th St.)/Sign-up (lottery) 6PM/Starts 6:30PM/no purchase necessary/4 min. 
SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min.
OPEN PROJECTOR @ FLAPPERS 102 E. Magnolia Ave., Burbank, CA/Starts 11PM/$5/First 12 to sign-up get screened 
FLAPPERS BAR 102 E. Magnolia Ave., Burbank, CA/Sign-up 10PM/Starts MIDNIGHT/lottery 

12) There are some disturbing similarities between booking comedy shows in a big city and being in a fantasy sports league.

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1) Jonah Ray’s Jonah’s Arcade was going to be a Comedy Central show, but sadly it’s not. Watch the pilot episode and maybe you’ll be inspired to start a letter writing campaign.

2) Actual video of Tony Clifton being thrown out of the Green Room with Paul Provenza. [via The Comic’s Comic]

3) Hey Internet, Can’t You Take a Fucking Joke? A piece by us for Laughspin.

4) Tonight, Bill Burr will be on The Late Show with David Letterman (CBS 11:35PM), Louie will be back at it’s normal time, but will go an entire hour (FX 10:30PM), NTSF:SD:SUV will have a strip club fight (Adult Swim 12:15AM), and The Green Room with Paul Provenza airs its infamous Tony Clifton episode (Yes, the one with the clip above) (Showtime 11PM).

4) Grantland’s already sniffing out Razzie front runners. Oh, what the human race would do without bad movies…

5) LA Comedy abroad and abroad-ish
Jeff MacKinnon’s recap for the Edinburgh Fringe Festival on days 8 & 9 on Laughspin
Travels with Kyle Kinane, Dispatch #3 on Splitsider

6) Connected Comedy lists the 3 Things Comedians Are More Afraid of Than They Should Be. Yeah, tellin’ like it is.

7) Earwolf interviews Drew Droege about his podcast Glitter in the Garbage.

8) COMEDY CRAWL
Gallows Humor @ Vlad’s the Retailer 7:30PM $5
The Imaginary Radio Program @ Nerdist Theater 8PM $8 online/$10 at door
1642 Comedy Social Club @ 1642 Beer & Wine 8:30PM FREE
6 Degrees @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $5 w/online promo code: six 
The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE 
Hamclown @ Alexandria Hotel (in the Mezz) 9PM FREE
Adams/Claybrooks/Brandt/Reutter @ Art Theatre 9PM $8
Comedy Central on Campus @ USC Campus Center Grand Ballroom 9PM 
The Comedy Palace @ The Palace Restaurant 9:30PM FREE
Small & Tall Tales @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5
Sweet, Sweet Stand-up @ M Bar 10PM Pay What You Can 
Rest in Peace @ Hollywood Hotel 10PM FREE 
The Tulsa Skull Swingers @ The Echo MIDNIGHT $10 

9) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA 6PM/$4 minimum/first come, first served
COFEE BEAN 16101 Ventura Blvd., Encino, CA, Suite 180/Starts 7PM/mixed mic/no purchase necessary
SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served
CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served/10 min.
SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min.
CAFE UNURBAN 3301 Pico Blvd., Santa Monica, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 9PM/No purchase necessary 
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served/coffee and bottled water available  

10) Neighbors was the shit. That’s all I’ll say for now.

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1) The Comedian/King of Comedy 2? [via Punchline Magazine]

2) Jeff Garlin on Conan.

3) Thai Rivera’s releasing his album TOMORROW at the Ontario Improv at 8PM. The pic below can get you in for free (drag and drop to a folder or your desktop, and print).

4) Forget about exclusionary, overpriced dance clubs, check out The Legacy Music Dance Party with Brent Weinbach and Rob F.  

The Legacy Music Dance Party - watch more funny videos

5) If you insist on getting your comedy through the small screen, the 2nd premiere night of Jon Benjamin Has a Van is tonight on Comedy Central 10:30PM and TOMORROW, Kyle Kinane is on Conan 11PM TBS.

6) NEW EPISODE OF KID FARM!!!

Kid Farm Channel
Tags: Atom.com | Funny Videos | Tournament | Upload

7) Interview with Emily Gordon, the Nerdist Theatre Director. [via DelusionsOfGrandeur]

8) When you’re on the local news and Jimmy Kimmel parodies you, you’re doing something right.  The Walsh Brothers’ planking video has done exactly that.

Planking Los Angeles: MyFoxLA.com

9) Tips to Get More of Stand-Up Videos. [via Connected Comedy]

10) Puddin’-“Justine Bateman”

11) ON THE HORIZON
Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop @ Regent Theatre Fri. June 24th
Comedy Off The Record @ The Basement Lounge Sun. 26th 8PM $5
Everything is Festival @ Cinefamily June 30th-July 4th

12) COMEDY CRAWL
Smartest Man in the World w/Greg Proops @ Bar Lubitsch 7PM FREE 
LA Indie Improv Tournament @ Room 101 8PM For Donation 
Meltdown @ Meltdown Comics 8:30PM $8 
The Ed Galvez Punk House @ Westside Comedy Theater 9PM $8
Frolic! @ Far Bar 9PM FREE
Beer in the Shower @ Dreams Cafe & Bar (at Dunes Inn) 9:30PM FREE
Facebook @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand by only) 
The Mostly Normal Show @ Hollywood Improv Lab 10:30PM $5 
The Anna Lee Lawson Comedy Hour @ Next Stage Theater 11PM $5 

13) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
THE SPOT CAFE 4455 Overland Ave., Culver City, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 7PM 
HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/first come, first served
CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min. guarantee
CAFE MUSE 6547 Santa Monica Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 8PM 
LIBRARY A COFFEE HOUSE 3418 Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 8PM/Starts 8:30PM 
LIQUID ZOO 7214 Sepulveda Blvd., Van Nuys, CA/Sign-up 8:30PM/Starts 9PM/first come, first served/7 min.
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served/coffee and bottled water available  

14) Saw a guy recently tape the comic before him at an open mic and I warned him that he shouldn’t really be doing that to which he responded, “Oh, I just want to show what a good comedian is like and then me, a bad comedian.” Is that where we are at open mics now? Just being bad for instructional purposes?

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Through the link is a listing of this week Nerdist Theater events.  That’s right, there’s more than just “Meltdown” on Wednesdays.  In fact, so many people missed out on the amazing Drennon Davis and his Imaginary Radio show last Friday, right before the world was supposed to end.

So, what I’m saying… is maybe you’ll want to check out Harmontown with “Community” creator Dan Harmon or a live recording of the Nerdist Podcast or the amazing open mic hosted by Matt Mira and Paul Cibis or really anything else in the back room of Meltdown Comics that isn’t on a Wednesday.

jonahray:

Number 87: ED HELMS

Bluegrass! The Office! Remote iPad control! A wide berth of topics to cure what ails ya (emotionally)! There’s a rap on the door of your heart…it’s Ed Helms!!! How could you turn him away? It’s. Just. Not. Possible. (audience “Awwwww”s, cue “Growing Pains” theme: “As Long as We’ve Got Each Other”, credits)

Nerdist and Ed Helms = Yes (only becaue I don’t know how to type a thumbs up).

jonahray:

Tim Farrell did some accompaniment for the QUEMMENTS theme song from the NERDIST PODCAST.

jonahray:

Nerdist Podcast #75: JAMES GUNN

In this episode, James Gunn (writer of the Dawn of the Dead remake, and writer/director of Slither and Super) and I have quite the zombie discussion, and yes…I end up taking it all too seriously.  I just can’t take a ZOM-BABY.

1) The iCandy Open Mic in Long Beach taking place every Friday in Long Beach has put itself in a rare class of open mics running for almost a decade.  Not only do they now pay their few booked performers, but they will very soon offer to match any other indepently produced and booked room that is willing to do so.  Thanks to Shayne Michael, Jeff Leon, Kerry Arnold Stephens, and these 97 other people, comics getting paid at an open mic has become possible.

2) Antithesis Comedy, another fine comedy site, is looking for comedian/musicians and comedian/filmmakers based in LA.  Message Jesse Castro Jr. for details.

3) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” this week to THE WALSH BROTHERS! Article/profile to follow soon

4) Always hilarious comedienne Jackie Kashian is correct in that there is stigma attached to the “solo show”, but I’m pretty sure we would all watch Jackie’s solo show.  The Comedy Bureau would.

6) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL
ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 7:30PM FREE
The Nerdist Podcast Live w/James Gunn @ The Nerdist Theatre 8PM $10
March Comedy Madness Finals @ The Comedy Store 8PM $14/2 drink min.
French Toast @ Taix 8:30PM FREE
Powerviolence @ The Complex 8:30PM FREE
Top Story Weekly @ iO West 9PM $5 
Gravid Water @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand by only)

7) OPEN MIC RUN
PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM 
SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min. 
TSUNAMEDY @ TRIBAL CAFE 1651 W. Temple St., Los Angeles, CA (Echo Park)/Sign-up 8PM/Starts 9PM
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed    

8) In case you decided to be a human and avoid social networking, Charlie Sheen bombed last night at his first show on his “Violent Torpedo of Truth Tour”. Big surprise.  I guess what counts as news these days is something happening that everyone expected. 

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1) It’s official: The Nerdist Theatre has arrived (@nerdmelt) and the back room of Meltdown Comics is no more (well, sort of).  Kicking off their inaugural weekend off with Jimmy Dore’s Pop and Politics tonight and a live Nerdist Podcast w/James Gunn tomorrow night, the Nerdist Theatre is sure to be one of the “places to be” in LA.

2) LA via Texas and Texas via LA: Hampton Yount’s experiences at SXSW and Matt Ingebretson and the Hell Yes Fest in the Austinist.

3) The Comic’s Comic is now on Tumblr.  I think you should follow.

4) Comedy Central now has a smart phone app for free.  Perhaps you can find out when Mash-Up is on at 3:30AM again even more accesibly than visiting the Comedy Bureau.

5) ON THE HORIZON
TJ Miller Makes Mayhem @ Largo Sun. Jun. 5th 8PM $20

6) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL
Two Headed Beast: A Story Telling Show @ Stories Books & Cafe 8PM FREE 
Mike Phirman @ Flappers Burbank 8PM/10PM $17/2 item min.
ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 8PM $10 (stand by only)
The Anytime Show w/Dominic Dierkes & Magic Bag @ Underground Annex Theatre 8PM/10PM $5 will get you into both shows
Truth or Dare @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $5 
The Thrilling Adventure Hour @ Largo 8:30PM $25 (sold out, tickets may be available at door)
Comediaplex @ Westside Comedy Theatre 9PM $10 
The Roast of Justin Bieber @ UCB Theatre 10PM $10
Ryan Stout @ Hollywood Improv 10PM $18 
The Midnight Show @ UCB Theatre MIDNIGHT $5 (stand by only)
Tomorrow Show w/Ron Lynch @ Steve Allen Theater MIDNIGHT $8 

7) OPEN MIC RUN
SPOT CAFE 4455 Overland Ave., Culver City, CA/Starts 2PM/people usually give feedback at end of set
WESTSIDE COMEDY THEATRE 1323-A 3rd St., Santa Monica, CA (in alley between 3rd and 4th St.)/Sign-Up 6PM/Starts 6:30PM
SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min.
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed      

8) May I stress that I have ABSOLUTELY no problem with people telling jokes that might be considered controversial or “too soon” as long as they’re inherently funny and not depending on mere hyperbole/graphic detail.  Perfect example from comedian Brooks Wheelan posted only a few days after the earthquake and tsunami struck Japan: @brookswheelan This whole Japan thing is the biggest win dolphins have had since the ‘72 undefeated season. #LARRYCSONKA.  Nicely done, Brooks.  Nicely done.

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